The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You by Elaine N. Aron. Read online, or download in secure EPUB format. The Highly Sensitive Person Self-assessment tests to help you identify your particular sensitivities Ways to reframe your past experiences in a positive light and. Editorial Reviews. medical-site.info Review. Are you an HSP? Are you easily overwhelmed by medical-site.info: The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You eBook: Elaine N. Aron Phd: Kindle Store.
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The highly sensitive person Author: Elaine Aron ; 3M Company. New York: Kensington Publishing Corp. English View all editions and formats Summary: Her balanced presentation suggests new paths for making sensitivity a blessing, not a handicap.
Zimbardo, author of -- The Chalice and the Blade. Read more Show all links. According to the author, Western and Indo-European societies tend to under-value many HSP attributes such as introversion, but HSP's are actually important contributors to a balanced civilization, acting as the advisors, judges, and spiritual leaders to the population majority's "warrior king" tendency to fearlessly expand and conquer.
The HSP tendency to "pause and check" is the cautious counterpoint that keeps civilizations in tact. I highly recommend this book for anyone who thinks they fall under the category of a highly sensitive person. I picked it up because it was recommended to me and although I was a little skeptical because it was one author's research and perspective, I was floored by how much of what she described fit my personality completely - in fact, not only me, but a few of my family members as well extreme sensitivity is an inherited genetic trait.
Aron writes in a manner that helps the HSP not only to cope with, but to celebrate their unique qualities. Society needs a select group of individuals who are creative, docile, and spiritually in tune to effectively function. In some cultures such as China, the HSP personality is the most highly-valued.
I found the chapters on physical treatment particularly helpful medications such as SSRI's or anti-anxiety meds may be helpful for HSP's both in the short or long term, but aren't necessarily a good fit for everyone. It should also be pointed out that some of her conclusions about SSRI's may be outdated as more research has been done since this book's publication in ' My favorite chapter was the final chapter, which focuses on the HSP's tie to the spiritual realm.
It was actually very practical, citing examples about how HSP's, religious and non- religious alike, tend to look inward and seek for explanations beyond what can be explained by science. Aug 16, Salma rated it did not like it.
View all 30 comments. Mar 04, Cindy rated it it was amazing Recommends it for: Those learning about people. Ever wonder why some people perceive almost everything while others seem oblivious? Ever wonder why some folks seem overwhelmed at times while others see to manage through those markets and crowds without a care?
Ever wonder why some are told they are just too sensitive, which makes them distance themselves from others? Have you ever thought you were weird because you couldn't stand to watch movies or read books with a lot of violence in them while other people seemed to love that stuff?
Have you ever felt completely overwhelmed from being around a lot of noise, strong scents, or bright lights, especially florescent lights? Have you ever been called "too sensitive" or "too shy? Are you particularly sensitive to changes in temperature, body language, and your surroundings?
Do other people's moods affect you? If so, you might be highly sensitive. No, this is not one of those self-help books written by a quack who is going to try to convince you to eliminate all forms of stress, including family, a job, and bills from your life in order to nourish your soul. But it is a book that will change your life if you think you might be highly sensitive.
I know, it sounds silly, but I'm telling you, as soon as I sat down to read this book, I felt like someone finally understood all of the little quirks about me that other people have always thought were weird but have always just been part of who I am.
I even talked to a few of my friends who I think might be highly sensitive, and they felt the same way. I decided to read this after Anne from Modern Mrs. Darcy modernmrsdarcy. I remember the blog post distinctly because it was the first time I had ever heard anyone else mention the topic of people who tend to "screen" books with violent content because they prefer to avoid any type of entertainment with it. As someone who has always avoided books, movies and TV shows with violence as well as scary movies in general, this caught my attention.
I always thought that my tendency to avoid scary movies was due to my overactive imagination that caused me to have frequent and vivid nightmares after watching these types of movies, which is in part true, but this is also a sign that you might be highly sensitive.
Aron, a licensed psychiatrist, takes readers on a journey through the mind of a highly sensitive person. If you yourself are highly sensitive, you'll learn more about how your mind and body work.
You'll learn how to view yourself as someone who is unique and ultimately needed in the universe. I particularly liked Aron's notes on the idea of a warrior-king type of personality and the idea of a more sensitive advisor type of personality and the benefits to society of both. I appreciated that while Aron encourages neither type of personality to view theirs as superior, each does have its own advantages. For example, as a sensitive person, you might be considered shy, sometimes aloof, or even arrogant, since you tend to keep to yourself and find it hard to make friends.
You tend to avoid social engagements with a large number of people and lots of noise and sounds, so people sometimes might think of you as a party pooper. But on the flip side, sensitive people are also the most compassionate, the most intuitive, and the most creative of all personality types. If you find yourself reading this book and realizing you are more than likely a highly sensitive person, you'll begin to look at past events in your life with a new understanding, perhaps even realizing why you reacted to certain things and people the way you did.
For some people, this might be a laughable subject. The idea that someone can be "highly sensitive. But if you find you just might belong to this category of rare but unique people, chances are if you find yourself on a site like GoodReads that encourages one to read as much as you can, you just might be then I highly suggest giving this a look.
I've found a lot of valuable info on working with others, building relationships with others, and having a more stressless environment that allows my highly sensitive self to thrive in this book, and I highly recommend it to others who might be searching for the same peace of mind.
Jan 01, Alexandra marked it as didnt-finish Shelves: DNF - Chapter 5 of I give up. So far not what I was looking for. I know I'm not "flawed" and my self-esteem is fine. What I was hoping to find here are ways to improve interactions with others, including hopefully ways to help them understand and accept I am not like them, but not "broken" or needing to "try harder" to be more like them.
This book so far has been all over the place. It's talking about "highly sensitive" to outside stimuli, but then talks about sensitivity in regards to being caring and nurturing, as if those things are the same or always go together - which is untrue.
It also paints non-HSPs in a bad light, as those prone to aggressive, even violent, behavior, uncaring about environmental issues, the evil corporate CEO, etc. Makes it sound like the author thinks all social liberals are HSPs, who are loving, nurturing, caring and peaceful people and all social conservatives are non-HSPs and evil warmongers out to destroy the environment.
Sorry, but I don't think highly sensitive introverts are all in one political box, nor do I think all those who are not sensitive to outside stimuli, or enjoy it, are all evil, uncaring, unfeeling people. This book so far is a mess. It's mixing up meanings of "sensitive" as if they're all interchangeable, and throwing in political stereotypes and even some religious new-agey stuff. At chapter 5 the only thing remotely helpful it's said is to advise to mute commercials when watching TV as commercials are intended to be highly stimulating.
Everything else so far either doesn't apply to me even though I scored high on the test included , is insulting and generalities to non-HSP people, contradictory or obviously false. I'm giving up. I recommend The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World instead. It's much better and much more helpful in my opinion.
Nov 25, Joel rated it really liked it Shelves: Aron has caught on to the fact that some of us are more susceptible to stimulation than others. She offers a checklist of characteristics that might indicate that you are highly sensitive including Aron has caught on to the fact that some of us are more susceptible to stimulation than others. She offers a checklist of characteristics that might indicate that you are highly sensitive including awareness of subtleties in your environment, being easily startled, having a rich inner life, being moved by the arts and music, and being sensitive to things like bright lights, loud noises, and caffeine.
It's a matter of culture, she insists. And her job is to help HSPs see their promise as persons in a civilization that holds the warrior to be of greater value than the scientist. You're a complicated being, she insists, and you should not reduce yourself to genes and systems. Here I think she has a valid point. Too often we who suffer from depression and bipolar disorder identify ourselves as our disease. If we see our destiny as hard-wired, there's not a lot we can do for ourselves.
We become little more than lab rats, testing one medication after another because the results aren't perfect. We may decide that the aim of our therapy is to numb ourselves to all pain -- a goal that we may be surprised to find is not shared by our psychiatrist or therapist.
She believes that there may be a doctor's culture which seems any kind of sensitivity as being a bad thing. I would remind her that most of us turned to doctors because the world leaned on us too hard, that being totally open and free not only got us in trouble but hurt - bad. Still, there are things about this book that make it a worthwhile read for those of us suffering from mood disorders. The world does often stimulate us beyond our sensitivities and we need to take steps to lessen that effect.
Aron points out that medications need to be seen as a safety net to keep us from going too high or too low. In no way should we see them as the way to introduce dramatic changes in our personality. Drugs or no drugs, we have an obligation to understand ourselves and to take steps to fulfill our promise as persons. Oct 01, Holly Lindquist rated it it was ok Shelves: I remember feeling quite jazzed about this book when I first read it. After all, I was so shy that I didn't really begin to connect with my peers until late middle school.
I felt overwhelmed every time I had to leave my house and whenever I was around people I was a tightly wound ball of anxiety and irritation. I always felt I was way more sensitive to nearly everything than most people, and here was a book that seemed to validate my experience and offer solutions.
Except the solutions didn't rea I remember feeling quite jazzed about this book when I first read it. Except the solutions didn't really work.
I even went to a Highly-Sensitive People support group for a time. I remember almost everybody in that room spoke very softly and had nervous rumbly stomachs. There was very little eye contact. We were like a bunch of vibrating tuning forks. It was interesting, but oddly unhelpful. I stopped going after awhile. I figured my sensitivity was something I just had to motor on with.
However, my problem was something more complex than just being "highly-sensitive". I have Asperger's Syndrome, which is on the autistic spectrum. A great deal of the sensitivities described in The Highly Sensitive Person could be applied directly to a mildly autistic person. Do loud noises make you cringe into a quivering ball? Of course.
Do you sometimes feel antagonized by clothing tags? Hellz yes. Do you go into a tailspin when forced to socialize for too long? Well, duh. And so on and so on.. I just found about my Asperger's at age 32 and I really can't help thinking I could have used such a discovery a bit earlier in my life..
I strongly suspect that other "Aspies" have gone over this book, chalked up their many quirks to just being sensitive, and then been left in the lurch when the one-dimensional approach to a far more complicated issue fails to improve their situation.
Looking back, I suspect that several people in that support group I attended had undiagnosed Asperger's and I hope they were able to find assistance that was tailored more specifically to their needs. So, to sum up, this book may be helpful to people who are a bit more sensitive or naturally shy, but its ambiguity may lead some in entirely the wrong direction. Finally, if you think you may be something more than just sensitive, if you're often confounded by social situations that don't faze others, or if you find yourself wondering if you're even living in the same sensory world as most people, than there is a fabulous online test for Asperger's called The Aspie Quiz.
Google it. Jul 03, Cindy rated it it was amazing. This book helped me realize what I had already suspected I was in fact a highly sensitive person. And more importantly View 2 comments.
Een fijn en goed boek. Fijn en duidelijk. Wat ik fijn vond aan dit boek: Dat er niets mis met je is, of afwijkend. Misschien wel anders, maar de ene persoon heeft het ook eerder koud dan de ander, dan is het ook niet raar dat andere prikkels bij de een anders binnen komen dan bij de ander, toch? Dit vond ik een heel fijn inzicht en een goede vergelijking. Wat ik Een fijn en goed boek. Wat ik minder fijn vond: Dit kan per persoon natuurlijk verschillen.
Feb 12, Tripleguess rated it liked it. With a box full of books to read and only so much spare time, I've implemented a new rule of thumb; generally, if the book doesn't hook me by the first few chapters, I stop reading it and try the next one.
I am a fast reader, so I don't feel I am asking too much of a book to keep me interested for twenty minutes. This title kept me engaged for about one third of the book. After that I started skimming, and when I had to force myself to keep going I said "Hey, what's up with that, I might as well With a box full of books to read and only so much spare time, I've implemented a new rule of thumb; generally, if the book doesn't hook me by the first few chapters, I stop reading it and try the next one.
After that I started skimming, and when I had to force myself to keep going I said "Hey, what's up with that, I might as well be reading something fun. I am different. Sometimes very different. There is a question "sensitivity test" on pages xxi-xxii; I answered 22 of them positively in other words, "Yes, this bothers me".
However, after the first three or four chapters, I felt that the book was repeating itself, saying the same things but merely changing the settings. HSPs are sensitive as adolescents. HSPs are especially affected by puberty. HSPs are especially affected by trauma. HSPs are especially affected by relationships. I have enough imagination that I don't need things spelled out for every aspect of life. Being a conservative Christian, I don't find the definite New Age slant of the book especially edifying, especially since it is not overtly acknowledged.
It has some interesting ideas, but as a fairly well-adapted sensitive person I don't find that I need the extensive advice and "make sure you feel good about yourself" handpatting. My summary: Seeking a sense of self! This illuminating read is full of profound insights, into the mind and experiences of the intuitive-sensitive being. If anyone so desires to feel and experience what it is like to be this --then look no further; for it's all here in front of you.
With a deeply complex, bitty family history and a lifetime of living only a certain way -adjusting to juggling and harmonizing would be the greatest challenge of all! I've explored the darkest recesses of the soul and , to all life's intensities with vigour and acute passion. Such understanding, empathy and connectivity is VITAL to an uber-sensitive soul, otherwise I can only predict a future existence of agonizing torture and exhaustion.
Looking at the light of divine reasoning, can cause temporary blindness! Jung is so right; as he quotes how discovering the question of your human life is a never-ending voyage, that's miraculous and so deeply-rooted you'll never be reluctant to turn from.
If one marks highly on the emotional level, the challenges that proceed will be unquestionably of greater value. Therefore, I'd advise caution beforehand for a rather shocking rollercoaster!
Trusting this trait takes some nerve, yet is a crucial aspect in awakening the one understanding --that'll lead to an experience of insurmountable approbation. Don't be doubtful or scared, this is meant to be; beautiful! Sep 10, Alison rated it liked it Shelves: First of all, I have to clarify for the record that The World is not, thankfully, at least at this point in my life , "overwhelming" me.
But I have often been told that I'm being "too sensitive" about a comment someone made about me And I got intrigued by this book when I saw it referenced in Oprah magazine.
And I got a score that landed me in the Yes zone. So I w First of all, I have to clarify for the record that The World is not, thankfully, at least at this point in my life , "overwhelming" me.
So I was intrigued and checked out the book. Perhaps surprisingly, there's little to no discussion of that emotional sensitivity or touchiness over comments from others.
Instead, Elaine Aaron's use of "sensitive" is actually "over arousal" in the nervous system: Still, much of what she discusses applies to certain aspects of my personality: If these same traits resonate with you, I think you'd definitely find this book an excellent source of food for thought. One thing I couldn't help wondering, however, and maybe it's because I'm one of the more internal consider-ers she talks about, rather than a "warrior king" type was whether the concept of sensitivity was being used too widely as a kind of blanket cop-out.
In other words, I know I tire easily after being around people too much, and need restorative alone time, despite the fact that I might seem like a social butterfly on the outside , and I know that I have a low tolerance for doing B.
And I would LOVE to be able to claim that I have a legitimate, neuro-scientific cause for these traits--I could justify needing a nap every day and needing to not hate my job!
But I worried that perhaps there was maybe a little bit too much "feel good about yourself for being a special HSP! Seriously, who does have a high tolerance for doing a job that isn't meaningful?
At the same time, each chapter raised at least one point I either hadn't considered before, or had considered at length but in some other context. So I think it's worth a read if you take the quiz and any of the personality traits apply to you.
Well, now I've been too "aroused" by dealing with all you people and need to go take a nap. May 29, Dejana rated it really liked it. I learned that not only nothing is wrong with me because I am "too sensitive", and that I don't need to develop a "thick skin", but that being highly sensitive is a gift that I should be proud of.
Apr 03, Sara Shakouri rated it it was ok Shelves: This book has a soothing tone of an adult talking to a firghtened child. I could understand that. I had been there too: So when the book started with stories of people terrified about losing their sanity, and the author threw in the nonsense about "royal-adviser class" I thought I can understand why she is doing this, although I This book has a soothing tone of an adult talking to a firghtened child.
So when the book started with stories of people terrified about losing their sanity, and the author threw in the nonsense about "royal-adviser class" I thought I can understand why she is doing this, although I could not stop myself from chuckling.
But that is not the way to write a book, if you want it to have a passable scientific base. Early on, Dr. Aron claims that HSPs are different people, because their nervous systems proceeds input data differently. Nowhere in the book you can find any more explanations: This lack of scientific approach can be observed in many minor cases HSP maybe sensitive to coffee, but then they may be not. Aron was having only a fraction of HSPs IF such label can exist, which should be left to the hands of experts to decide in mind: I looked forward to use some tips to cope with unpleasant situations say a co-worker turning pages of his notebook too loudly, making me as irritated as hell , but there seems to be very little fitting with me.
I she says about is being overwhelmed by a situation, following a general solution of love yourself, embrace yourself, protect yourself from the world. I can still have difficulty accepting the analogy between an infant and an HSP, and most of the book is based on this idea. However, it has some good points for raising your children, HSP or not. Jul 22, Christine Lloyd rated it really liked it.
I'm a lot happier after reading this book, not because it changed me but because it gave me the language to talk about my quirks and the confidence to be OK with them. However, as somebody on the sensitive end of the spectrum, I've spent a lot of time frustrated by my inability to deal with long parties with strangers, loud concerts with bright light effects, and a I'm a lot happier after reading this book, not because it changed me but because it gave me the language to talk about my quirks and the confidence to be OK with them.
However, as somebody on the sensitive end of the spectrum, I've spent a lot of time frustrated by my inability to deal with long parties with strangers, loud concerts with bright light effects, and all-day festivals. These are all things that make my friends so happy, and while I enjoy them for the first hour or four, I'm almost always miserable by the end.
I've spent so much mental energy trying to "fix" myself so that I'm able to do things like go the state fair for the day, and I've been entirely without success. Instead, and with prompting from this book, I've been learning when to say "enough," when to tell everybody "I've had a fantastic time, and I need to head home now.
Love you! It's a really easy simple fix, but it took reading most of this book for me to be OK with implementing it. So yes, interesting in its own right and a total lifesaver for me specifically. Jul 09, Meg rated it liked it. This book describes that percentage of the population whose systems are easily over stimulated by sensory information. Wow, do I wish someone had given me this book to read, like, 10 years ago. The criticisms: I found this irritating.
I felt like the book really begged the question, as it used the metaphor of taking care of your body's needs as if your body were a baby. As a therapist, I am curious about this. For example, she goes on at length about how shyness is an acquired trait, unlike sensitivity which is inborn.
This didn't make sense to me. Why can't shyness be inborn too? I'm not. Jan 08, Krysten Watson rated it it was amazing. Once I got past the title and understood why Dr. Aron uses the phrase HSP, I was on much better terms with the book. In fact, it was quite a relief to read about my own personality, which is often quietly and unobtrusively at odds with modern American culture, from a rather clinical, yet entirely compassionate, point of view.
After leaving for college, I discovered a real appreciation for my parents and after reading this book, even more so.
I was brought up in a quiet environment that nurtured Once I got past the title and understood why Dr. As an HSP, I just pick up on subtleties with extraordinary ease that others would struggle to discern. As always, having a better understanding of a thing helps one to overcome or live with it. This book has helped me do both. Nov 17, Kelly rated it liked it Shelves: I really liked the overall message of this book and found it informative.
Unfortunately I also found it rather dry, and some of the exercises and comparisons outdated and obtuse. Oct 07, Will Lees rated it really liked it. This book describes me very well. If felt that finally there was a book and a name for the cluster of many of my traits. A friend in the medical field said that this book describes a personality profile, not a particular diagnosis. However through the author's evidence she shows that sensitivity is a distinct trait, not a side-effect or problem.
After reading this book, I was much more comfortable describing what works for me because I fit being a highly sensitive person. The book says "we are 15 This book describes me very well.
The book says "we are 15 to 20 percent of the population But more than that, the list itself helped validate that there was a condition at work, that it wasn't just my subjective inadequacies that caused me to experience life as challenging, difficult and different.
What I like about the book is that it is useful: I found one of the mental model tools to be novel, insightful and downright strange.